Pretty sure none of that's real.

                There will never be any angels. God has not promised angels. No verse states:

                “And your calling shalt be made known unto you, upon completing 12^th grade, by a heavenly host singing: ‘Myra, Myra, Myra, harken unto our plan.’

                And you shall walk diligently in the words these angels tell you, and thou shalt never be confused, neither shall your steps wander, neither shall you ever question the future. The angels shall deliver one purpose, and that sole purpose shall drive you from youth to adulthood peacefully, just as the angel’s words drove your fellow brethren to be physicians and missionaries and psychologists." 

                Uh, pretty sure none of that’s real. Actually, I am quite sure that I just made all that up. I am promised no cloud of heavenly hosts shining with light, singing my purpose out over my head on graduation day.

                And I know why, I just don’t like owning up to it. But I should. Because knowing the answer means I can stop this frantic searching.

                You see, my mind has been stuck in a rut. A rut of thinking that I have one occupation waiting for me, and all other occupations are wrong. When I put it that way, it sounds reasonable and follow your-inner-star-ish. But when I say occupation, I actually mean, “I must know I’m supposed to be a school teacher until I die.” Or a nurse. Or a chef. Or a clown. Or a garbage man. I’m searching for that “degree-able” thing.  That thing.           

             

                I’ve missed the point. I’m so caught up in searching for the point that I have actually missed it. I have been too close to the mirror.

                Because, well, I was born with a purpose. Before the foundations of the world, God knew I was his Child, and God has given promises to His children. Our purpose has been determined, set, and planned for eternity. And it’s not something “degree-able,” or “certifiable.” But it is a result of salvation.

                And it is this:

                “Seek justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8

                “Let your Light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your father which is in heaven.”  Matthew 5:16

                “…visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” James 1:27

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.” Luke 10:27

And that’s just four verses.
                It doesn’t matter if I am a cook or the president. It doesn’t matter if I end up teaching or writing or playing a kazoo. God has given me gifts and talents, and I need not fear following the “wrong” road, or being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I cannot thwart God’s plan! If my heart is set securely on honoring God, everywhere I walk or lean or grow, I will seek Him, and He will lead me.

If I am walking humbly, and loving the Lord my God, and letting my light shine, I can literally be anything.

Anything.

I don’t need to wait for angels,

Or rainbows,

Or eyelashes,

Or dandelions,

Or shooting stars,

Or birthday candles to do their job. The job’s been done. No more wishing! God set my purpose, and how I live it our need not give me angst.

For if, at 100, I can say “life was good,” maybe it’s not because of how many jobs or degrees I have or had.

No, it’s because God was good. And the end of highschool isn’t the end of the world.

For every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.